Presencing Through the U
Britney Hicks
The Buell Early Childhood Leadership Program has been a reframing of my heart and mind. It has been friendships and a sounding board and a place for personal growth. It has pushed my boundaries - learning, research, personal, emotional. It has knocked down walls that I bricked and mortared and sealed shut. It changed my perspective to illuminate equity and challenge biases.
In an act of reflection, I drew my journey “through the U”. It is full of twists and turns and sharp corners and meandering swirls. It tells a story of beginning the program with a plan - step one BECLP, step two EdD. Right away, I was knocked off my plan into a journey of learning myself, listening to stories that have stuck with me indefinitely, reflecting and reading and listening. It speaks of planning and hope and beginning to build a path again. It encounters the pandemic and the upheaval of the path. It has a happy, hopeful way back up the U with so much possibility. It is my journey and also not my journey. I am not sure I am on my way back up or if I am starting my U now, again. The journey I drew is the journey I am on and it is also the journey I am not on. I don’t feel that the chaos of now is part of my presencing and letting come. I think it is part of my letting go and seeing. I am experiencing sensing as I listen and reimagine with a more open heart and mind.
Illuminating Children’s Rights During a Global Pandemic
Reflection. And silence. And sadness. And hope. Busy and bored. Worried and calm. Anxious and content. Sad and joyful. Exhausted and rejuvenated. So many ANDs. These last nine weeks have given me a gift. A gift that I would be remiss without acknowledging my privilege in being able to receive it. I have been able to sit and be still and reflect and dream. I have daydreamed about the future and reminisced about the past. I have come face to face with some of my biases that I never knew were lurking below the surface.
I have been watching and listening while deeply immersed in the intricacies of teaching and learning and parenting and partnering through a pandemic. I have also been perched, watching and listening, as children navigate this new world and families come together and fall apart and come together and fall apart again and again.
Like so many of you, I have been in countless meetings with other professionals trying to ‘figure this all out’ -
How will we do the tasks?
How can we get the things to the people?
Will we give them enough for them to keep up?
If they were already behind, how do we catch them up now?
How do we keep them going?
Some of the questions would touch on things like - do they have what they need? and - how are they? But the Things and the Doing and the Checkboxes clouded our humanity. Still, I need to know. How are they? What do they need? How is the isolation changing their brains and hearts? Are they safe? What does the world look like for them? What will they need if we come back to in person learning? What will they need if we don’t?
How will we do the tasks?
How can we get the things to the people?
Will we give them enough for them to keep up?
If they were already behind, how do we catch them up now?
How do we keep them going?
Some of the questions would touch on things like - do they have what they need? and - how are they? But the Things and the Doing and the Checkboxes clouded our humanity. Still, I need to know. How are they? What do they need? How is the isolation changing their brains and hearts? Are they safe? What does the world look like for them? What will they need if we come back to in person learning? What will they need if we don’t?
This post on The Washington Post talks about signs of mental health crisis and what to do to prevent or treat it. The information, while written from a privileged perspective, is good - for adults. What about our children? What about what they need to prevent or treat mental health crisis? Who is checking in with them? What if the adults in their lives can’t or won’t? How do we hear their voices? When we do go back to school, however that may look, how do we ensure that the kids are ok? In my opinion, children have rights to receive social and emotional support and experience meaningful educational opportunities with an equitable process and from/with diverse voices in their schools. Will these rights be upheld? Or will they be stripped away in prioritizing academic progress?
Where do we go from here?
This pandemic has created spotlights onto inequities. The journey so far has been full of zig-zags and barriers. Yet there is a flickering. A rumbling. Under the surface. A reimagining being quietly daydreamed. How do we push it up? Who needs to be at the table to reform and present this new vision? How do we get all of the voices heard? How do we make the ears hear them?
I think that our only way forward is to embody an Ubuntu way of thinking and existing. I am only because you are. We can only be ok if we are all ok. We can only learn if we can all learn. Progress is only made when we all make it. We have to listen. And then we have to listen some more. We need to reflect and wonder and listen again. And then we need to act.
I think that our only way forward is to embody an Ubuntu way of thinking and existing. I am only because you are. We can only be ok if we are all ok. We can only learn if we can all learn. Progress is only made when we all make it. We have to listen. And then we have to listen some more. We need to reflect and wonder and listen again. And then we need to act.
The journey through the U that I drew is true, the U shape is too rigid for my journey, though. During this pandemic and reimagining, I did not go backwards to more letting go and seeing, I grew forward into them. Maybe for me, the U needs to be more fluid up and down and over again. There seems to be a constant looping and moving and reimagining. My work will not end. I will not “solve” the puzzle. I will, though, continue to learn and listen and breathe. I will start somewhere and follow it everywhere. With you and for you and because of you. I am because you are.